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I Want to Be and Love My Autistic Self

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I Want to Be and Love My Autistic Self

By: Travis Breeding
Narrated by: Brandon Ison
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About this listen

Travis shares about his experiences with receiving help through autism services offered to him. He shares the effects of years of masking his autism and hiding who he truly is. He shares some of his experiences with applied behavior analysis as an adult. He talks about how he was ridiculed by staff and others in society for being who he was and having autistic traits.

Travis shares the emotional pain and trauma that he feels has been created by years of masking his autism or hiding his true identity. He talks about the anxiety and depression that have been created as a result of masking it for so long. He shares his story of how his staff tries to discourage him from wanting the same things most human beings want in life because he is autistic. He talks about how behavior therapists only want to work on goals they have for Travis without taking into consideration goals Travis has for himself.

Travis used to endorse applied behavior analysis before fully understanding the effects it has on an autistic person. Travis had a positive experience with a board-certified behavior analyst in his early 20s where they worked on conversation skills and talking to people, and he thought that was ABA therapy. It turns out what they were working on was not ABA therapy, and Travis didn't have what many autistic adults describe as the torture of ABA therapy with discreet trial training and numerous other things.

As an adult, Travis receives the autism waiver for support services in which he does receive behavior therapy. His experience with behavior therapy has been that the therapist wants to change who he is as a person and that he is not allowed to be autistic. Being asked to mask his autism led Travis to believe he had to mask his autism with everyone. The stress and anxiety of masking really took a toll on Travis, and he finally decided he wasn't going to mask anymore.

This audiobook is all about Travis releasing his autism and being who he truly is. Travis is an autistic adult who is brilliant, fun, intelligent, caring, and loving. He has some quirks, but Travis now thinks those quirks can be a part of what makes him a really good friend.

Listen along to learn of Travis' experience with being treated for autism by support services available and learn how damaging that was to him. Then you'll learn what Travis is doing to undo some of that damage and create a loving life for himself as an autistic adult by being true to himself and his autism.

©2018 Travis Breeding (P)2019 Travis Breeding
Children's Health People with Disabilities Relationships Autism Mental Health
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