How to Have Impossible Conversations
A Very Practical Guide
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How to Have Impossible Conversations
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Narrated by:
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Peter Boghossian
About this listen
From politics and religion to workplace negotiations, ace the high-stakes conversations in your life with this indispensable guide from a persuasion expert.
In our current political climate, it seems impossible to have a reasonable conversation with anyone who has a different opinion. Whether you're online, in a classroom, an office, a town hall—or just hoping to get through a family dinner with a stubborn relative—dialogue shuts down when perspectives clash. Heated debates often lead to insults and shaming, blocking any possibility of productive discourse. Everyone seems to be on a hair trigger.
In How to Have Impossible Conversations, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay guide you through the straightforward, practical, conversational techniques necessary for every successful conversation—whether the issue is climate change, religious faith, gender identity, race, poverty, immigration, or gun control. Boghossian and Lindsay teach the subtle art of instilling doubts and opening minds. They cover everything from learning the fundamentals for good conversations to achieving expert-level techniques to deal with hardliners and extremists. This book is the manual everyone needs to foster a climate of civility, connection, and empathy.
"This is a self-help book on how to argue effectively, conciliate, and gently persuade. The authors admit to getting it wrong in their own past conversations. One by one, I recognize the same mistakes in me. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book."—Richard Dawkins, author of Science in the Soul and Outgrowing God
©2019 Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay (P)2019 Hachette AudioListeners also enjoyed...
Critic reviews
"This is a self-help book on how to argue effectively, conciliate, gently persuade. The authors admit to getting it wrong in their own past conversations. One by one, I recognize the same mistakes in me. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book."—Richard Dawkins, author of Science in the Soul and Outgrowing God
"In a Free Republic there would be no 'impossible conversations', which begs the question: are we truly free anymore? After reading, listening and conversing with Peter and James, I am convinced that they are the Galileo's, I. Kant and even William Tynsdale of our time."—Glenn Beck
"I thought I knew all I needed to know about conversations and arguments. I was wrong. I just knew a lot about debates and rows. In their insightful and highly readable new book, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay offer all kinds of ingenious pathways to constructive dialogue. At a time when public discourse has degenerated into mud-slinging and when campuses favour every kind of diversity except viewpoint diversity, this is an invaluable contribution. I guarantee that reading it will make you more—much more—persuasive."—Niall Ferguson, Milbank Family Senior Fellow, The Hoover Institution, Stanford
What listeners say about How to Have Impossible Conversations
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Mr. Ronald Wild
- 28-04-21
Excellent information.
I've been a devotee of verbal judo, as taught by the late and lamented George Thompson and was given a copy of ' How to Win Friends and Influence People' as a teenager. This book extends those skills. I didn't learn a lot of completely new information, but current phraseology is helpful. What it mostly did for me, was allow me to see where my skills had rounded off, unfocused and slipped in their effectiveness.
I took a train ride, discovered my opposite passenger was a Tory, by way of political leaning, and played the game getting him to explain why their policies were better than mine. It was a few days before I got a tremendous Corbynista, and played the same game in reverse.
I think train and plane companies should sponsor this book and hire deliberate polemicists to enliven tedious commutes.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Karen
- 15-11-19
How to moderate your thoughts and speech
While this book gave me lots of food for thought, and contains interesting insights, research and ideas; it is a book about becoming more centrist/sounding more moderate, it is not a book that will help you converse about genuinely difficult or oppressive circumstances.
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10 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Mr. J. Rayner
- 28-11-19
Great
This is a really great book. I've read several like it recently, but this is one of the best. Some really good tips about the structure of conversations in regards to difficult topics plus much more about daily interaction.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 01-10-23
Very good
Boghossian and Lindsay are two of the most important voices in the anti-woke movement. This book helps the listener to begin to engage in politically controversial discussions with opponents and ideologies, offering pragmatic strategies for promoting civil conversation throughout. Highly recommend.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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- AnnaJ
- 05-02-22
Straightforward, sensible, helpful
Having become increasingly frustrated by both on and offline discourse, and the inability to talk about difficult subjects, this book was exceptionally refreshing and helpful. It has changed my own approach, my attitude, and my ability to engage. And there is no faffing around chit chat, which I like a lot.
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Mohani
- 08-08-20
Dry at times
Started off well. Very useful techniques but delivered in a dry manner at times. Could have held my attention if role play with another person instead of scripted methods. Your biases against Christianity came through and pointing to your modernist roots. Not sure I appreciated your examples when using Christianity.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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- chris kirkland
- 23-09-19
Recommended for anyone planning on having a conversation
A great listen, and presumably also a great read. Handy for both impossible and possible conversations.
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3 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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- Hannu Haapala
- 29-06-21
Informative!
Very informative. Everyone has to read this. This should be mandatory school book. Loved it.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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- E. A. L. Aspbury
- 14-11-20
Great advice
Reveals why many conversations go awry. Labours the point sometimes but no harm in that.
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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- Algeron
- 01-10-20
Buy the book, not the audiobook
The narration confused the hell out of me. For a book that relies mainly on dialogue to get the point across, I think it was a terrible decision to have it read aloud by one speaker who includes the names of the characters as if read by an artificial intelligence that doesn't understand what it's doing. Real shame, because there's a lot of complexity and intricacy that gets lost. Caviar drenched in ketchup.
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