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An Oracle Walks into a Bar

The Misadventures of a Paranormal Post-Relationship Personal Effects Repossession Specialist, Book 1

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An Oracle Walks into a Bar

By: Scott Burtness
Narrated by: Ray Lesniewski
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About this listen

Messy breakup? Want your stuff back from your ex? Shapeshifter August Shade can help. Satisfaction not guaranteed.

When a power-hungry elf hires August to get her favorite book back from her vampire ex-lover, August figures it’ll just be another job. Except that vampire is the meanest vampire this side of Canada, the book bestows its reader with the power to write their own future, and the elf isn’t the only one that wants the book. Things go from bad to worse when a horoscope-writing oracle starts having visions of the end of the world, and August pops up in all of them.

The cranky shapeshifter can change into a lot of things, but can he change the future? Haunted by a dark past, plagued by the oracle’s predictions, and grappling with his penchant for making bad decisions, the only sure thing about August’s future is that it looks short.

***

Human Brain Pledge

This story was written by a human. No AI writing assist technology was used in the creation of this story.

©2021 Scott Burtness (P)2024 Scott Burtness Fantasy Fiction Humorous Paranormal Comedy City Vampire
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oracle

I enjoyed the narration of Ray Lesniewski, who brings out the humour

This book has great characters, humour and weirdness. Full of wacky otherworldly, supernatural characters and a protagonist whose just the right side of sleazy, lazy and slightly obnoxious.

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Fun

This was a great story. Funny, childish humour but light hearted and worth it. A refreshing change from some of the more serious stuff you read. Recommend this.

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